Sunday, July 21, 2013

All Things Good

cul·ture shock
The feeling of disorientation experienced by someone who is suddenly subjected to an unfamiliar culture, way of life, or set of attitudes.

Life change comes when we receive life with thanks and ask for nothing to change. (Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts)

Leaving routine and all that was familiar. 
Before going shopping, I keep thinking that I need to make sure I have enough cash, before realizing that I can just use a card. 
I automatically take off my shoes when entering a house, and I compulsively lock my car doors when driving. 
I barely notice the triple-digit weather, but put on a jacket in air conditioning. 
Colors and tastes seem stronger, advertisements feel like they are in my face, grocery stores simultaneously fill me with both uncontrollable excitement and anxiety.

I've been moody.  Feeling more introverted than usual.  Wondering what is wrong with me.  Connected but by a long string.  Loved but lost.  Disoriented.


Undeserving, honestly, of the generous, unconditional embrace from all those around me. 

I feel sometimes like two people, or living two lives.  I don't belong fully to either of them.  I don't fully understand either of them.

Yet there is breathtaking blessing in living two lives.  If absence makes the heart grow fonder, then long absence makes the heart really fond.
of salami
laughter over old family pictures
snuggling a new nephew

strawberries and ice cream
smooth roads

my Daddy's garden
grandkids and grandparents together

breathing in

The brave who focus on all things good and all things beautiful and all things true, even in the small, who give thanks for it and discover joy even in the here and now, they are the change agents who bring fullest Light to all the world. (Ann Voskamp)

Disorientation turns to clarity.  

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